Trusting the Process – A Birth Story and the Power of Breaking Patterns

There is something profoundly powerful about trusting your body. My recent second birth, like my first, was completely natural and free of medical interventions. This time I did not have to fight for space or boundaries; I could simply be.

Unlike my first birth, when I spent a week in a birth hotel, I delivered at home with a midwife while also holding space for my eldest child. That changed everything.
What did not change was my belief in softness, rest, and intuition, a belief deepened after taking Nira van Dijk’s birthing course. Her approach helped me stand up for myself and request a birth at home, in my safest place.

I carefully planned my after-care, knowing my bipolar condition puts me at higher risk for postpartum psychosis. Although medical options focused on medication and hospitalization, I chose to rely on culture, faith, and my inner circle. Our traditional forty days of rest, bonding, and no visitors proved crucial for healing and breastfeeding.

For this column I interviewed Nira because her work is vital for many pregnant women. She is a mother of two, a birth coach, and a momfluencer. She became a coach after finding typical birth-prep classes clinical and fear-based and wanted women to connect to their strength, not their fear.

Ocean to meadow, she carries new life through salt-kissed waves and sun-lit grass, letting earth and tide hum the same quiet lullaby ; Image Source: Nira Van Dijk

Nira’s course equips pregnant women with knowledge, confidence, and practical tools to navigate pregnancy and birth on their own terms. When I asked why such courses matter today, she explained:

“Women have been diminished for generations, made to feel small and unimportant, taught to be the good girl, told not to think too much, and to distrust intuition. The result is enormous trauma around birth, an experience that touches the very core of who you are as a woman. It shapes motherhood and stays with you for life. We need more than a checklist. We need awareness, depth, and, above all, trust in ourselves.”

Her honesty and realism set her apart, and her own journey proves why. A recent season in Norway surrounded her with crisp air and slow rhythms, showing how deeply place can temper stress and sharpen intuition. “Your surroundings shape your mindset before you notice,” she says. That truth threads through every lesson she teaches.

Alongside coaching, Nira has grown into a momfluencer, something she never planned. “I started sharing my journey through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum with no business plan. The openness resonated, and it naturally became both a company and a side hustle born out of passion.”

She is exactly my kind of momfluencer: a woman who shows the beauty and the mess and speaks openly about mental health. Partnerships knock on her door, yet principle steers the reply. “Integrity matters more than money. If a brand is not aligned, I walk away even if it pays well. Freedom is the best perk of keeping this a side project.”

Family patterns add another layer to her story.

“There is a strong shaming culture in my background,” she says. “We heard lines like ‘you are stupid’ or ‘no one will marry you like this.’ That language runs deep. I still catch myself, bite my tongue, and choose kinder words. Progress is step by step, built on patience and self-compassion.”

She and her husband share a history of parents who separated when their children turned four. Their own kids have passed that age and the marriage holds firm, yet she knows a pattern is never erased in a single generation. “Sometimes it shows up quietly. The real work is noticing the echo and choosing better instead of sliding into old survival habits.”

If you are Dutch and want to prepare confidently for birth and postpartum at your own pace, explore her platform House of Mothers at houseofmothers.nl or follow her on Instagram @niravandijk.

I am deeply thankful for women like Nira who keep mental health at the heart of life-changing moments. Her guidance reminded me that my body already knew how to lead and how to trust itself; I simply needed the right support to remember.